Hattie & Lucia

I think The Aristocats is tha bomb. I’d lay back and watch it every day if I wasn’t so busy makin’ my own hits. I’d never dis this funky video about a downtown alley cat who smooth-talks a fine feline and ends up livin’ large in the land of croissants. That’s my dream, too.

O’Malley the alley cat is awright — he’s no Dr. Dre, but hey, that homey’s got a place in my dogg pound anytime. Ya gotta give him a big bowwow for getting his boys together to off that gangsta Edgar, the butler who’s after the cats’ big-bucks inheritance.

And ya gotta love mama kitty Duchess — she knows how to take care of her babies, and, meoww, she’s cavvy. She’s got that ooh-la-la accent and her nose is high in the air, but once she gets an earful of Scat Cat — voiced by the man, the great Scatman Crothers — she loosens up and shakes it out. Talk about cool jazz cats. Tha’s right.

The tunes don’t leave your head. I sho’ have a bone to pick with the lyrics to ”Ev’rybody Wants to Be a Cat,” but just try to stop hummin’ it. Can’t do it. I got my own ideas for doin’ a Disney soundtrack — maybe the live-action 101 Dalmatians? I’d do it on the spot. Ha! Call my man and let’s do lunch.

Ya don’t like this movie, stay outta my tilt. Ya got the wrong attitude. The kids in the hood — who know French as the language of fries under the golden arches — will have as good a time watching this fine flick as those who can dig the meaning of, ahem, ”Scales and Arpeggios.” And mamas and daddies, including yours truly, just may find themselves tuned in to this tape even when the pups are napping.

These cats sho’ age well. My homeys don’t look as good at 26 as this movie does. These cats got a lot more lives to live.